School Started On Monday (HEAVY SIGH)

And boy have we been stressed!! PJ started at Tapp Middle School which had its orientation last Thursday night. We rec'd a letter a while back saying that the school did not meet its test scores for Special Ed students so it was now a "Needs Improvement" school and we could choose to send our child to one of 2 other middle schools in the area as long as we provided transportation. I just disregarded that letter because Morgan went to Tapp for 3 years and the nearest alternative is 9 miles away, but my neighbor convinced us to re-consider so we went to one of the alternate schools to visit. Then we went to Tapp's orientation where the 6th grade admin. gave a presentation to parents and students which, when describing the dress code, included exhorting the girls to "cover their jewels." THEN, at the end of the presentation the woman read a poem by Maya Angelou and played a song by Fantasia. I couldn't even look at Patrick at that point because I KNEW I would just start laughing out loud. That kind of clinched the whole idea of switching schools. I don't mind diversity, but COME ON!!

I'm in an appraisal class this week so poor Patrick has had to deal with getting the principal to sign our ticket out of there (which she was not happy about doing), registering PJ at the new school, then having to go BACK to the first school to withdraw him. So, its been a busy week, but today PJ started at the new middle school and we will be carpooling with 2 other parents from Tapp so life may settle down again back to normal.

Here is a picture Josh sent a while back that I forgot to post.

5 Minute Management Course

It has been a while since I found something funny...I mean I have been in Arkansas for 2 days....this was pretty funny. 5 Minute Management Course Lesson 1: A man is getting into the shower just as his wife is finishing up her shower, when the doorbell rings.The wife quickly wraps herself in a towel and runs downstairs.When she opens the door, there stands Bob, the next-door neighbor.Before she says a word, Bob says, 'I'll give you $800 to drop that towel..' After thinking for a moment, the woman drops her towel and stands naked in front of Bob, after a few seconds, Bob hands her $800 and leaves. The woman wraps back up in the towel and goes back upstairs.When she gets to the bathroom, her husband asks, 'Who was that?''It was Bob the next door neighbor,' she replies.'Great,' the husband says, 'did he say anything about the $800 he owes me?' Moral of the story: If you share critical information pertaining to credit and risk with your shareholders in time, you may be in a position to prevent avoidable exposure. Lesson 2: A priest offered a Nun a lift. She got in and crossed her legs, forcing her gown to reveal a leg. The priest nearly had an accident. After controlling the car, he stealthily slid his hand up her leg. The nun said, 'Father, remember Psalm 129?'The priest removed his hand. But, changing gears, he let his hand slide up her leg again. The nun once again said, 'Father, remember Psalm 129?'The priest apologized 'Sorry sister but the flesh is weak.' Arriving at the convent, the nun sighed heavily and went on her way.On his arrival at the church, the priest rushed to look up Psalm 129. It said, 'Go forth and seek, further up, you will find glory.' Moral of the story: If you are not well informed in your job, you might miss a great opportunity. Lesson 3: A sales rep, an administration clerk, and the manager are walking to lunch when they find an antique oil lamp. They rub it and a Genie comes out. The Genie says, 'I'll give each of you just one wish.' 'Me first! Me first!' says the admin clerk. 'I want to be in the Bahamas , driving a speedboat, without a care in the world.' Puff! She's gone.'Me next! Me next!' says the sales rep. 'I want to be in Hawaii , relaxing on the beach with my personal masseuse, an endless supply of Pina Coladas and the love of my life.' Puff! He's gone. 'OK, you're up,' the Genie says to the manager. The manager says, 'I want those two back in the office after lunch.' Moral of the story: Always let your boss have the first say. Lesson 4: An eagle was sitting on a tree resting, doing nothing.A small rabbit saw the eagle and asked him, 'Can I also sit like you and do nothing?' The eagle answered: 'Sure, why not.'So, the rabbit sat on the ground below the eagle and rested. All of a sudden, a fox appeared, jumped on the rabbit and ate it. Moral of the story: To be sitting and doing nothing, you must be sitting very, very high up. Lesson 5: A turkey was chatting with a bull. 'I would love to be able to get to the top of that tree' sighed the turkey, 'but I haven't got the energy.' 'Well, why don't you nibble on some of my droppings?' replied the bull.They're packed with nutrients.' The turkey pecked at a lump of dung, and found it actually gave him enough strength to reach the lowest branch of the tree. The next day, after eating some more dung, he reached the second branch.Finally after a fourth night, the turkey was proudly perched at the top of the tree. He was promptly spotted by a farmer, who shot him out of the tree. Moral of the story: Bull Shit might get you to the top, but it won't keep you there...

5 Minute Management Course

What am I doing in Arkansas?

Good question that I have asked myself several times today. Technically I am here to hire a manager for a store we are opening in a WalMart in Rogers Arkansas. Just getting here is a bit of a challenge. The closest decent size city is Fayetteville (sp?)...flights from Dallas to Fayatteville were retarded. $450+ with a layover. What?!? It is an hour flight...how do you have a layover? There is nothing between Dallas and Arkansas to layover to... Of course Southwest Airlines flies to Tulsa which is only 100 miles or so from Rogers so that is the way I ended up going...Flight was only $130 with no layover but I get the added joy of a 100 mile drive through OK. Nice. This is the city where Wal Mart's home office is located so the fact that we are building a Campero in the first Wal Mart ever is supposed to be some sort of big deal. I don't consider any failed business idea a big deal unless it drags a company into the abyss. This is a bad idea and it will not be successful but, hey, I just do what I am told. Luckily, it won't drag us anywhere near the abyss but I can't see how this failure will help my career. On the bright side, I could be wrong and this could be an awesome idea...Yea, unfortunately my track record predicating this stuff is usually pretty good. To shed some light on this lovely little berg, I ate at an all you can eat BBQ Rib place tonight...Have you ever heard of such a thing? The waitress actually told me not to order the $15 entree' I had asked for because they had the $10 all you can eat rib special...It was very nice of her but it doesn't make me think this area is crawling with upper middle class rib (or chicken) eaters. There are probably 30 restaurants within 4 miles on this street with at least 10 empty buildings that were restaurants that have closed...another great indication of a place we want to build our new restaurant. Anyway, I am very excited about the 18 (yes, I wrote 18) interviews I have tomorrow...I am sure I will be blown away by the quality of the candidates and general hygenie of this group. Fun, Fun. As you can tell, I am doing a fine job of maintaining a very positive attitude toward this whole venture...hooray, well done, me. BTW--Donna-- the trip we talked about around the 15th is not going to happen. Sorry about that...we will get out there someday soon. Take care all. ron

Happy Birthday Michael!

Hope you have a great day!!

Hey Ron and Kathryn!

Good to hear about your progress in moving in. We stopped using cable 4 years ago when we moved into our new house (not so new anymore) and we've never looked back. We had Comcast and they TOTALLY sucked (sorry can't think of a better way to describe it). We started with DirectTV and I liked them just fine except at the time they did not have the Tennis Channel so when Dish Network called with an offer for a high def 200 hour DVR with our subscription and they DID have the Tennis Channel. We switched over. Now, of course DirectTV has Tennis Channel, but we've never had any problems using satellite, and DishNetwork just added the Tennis Channel in high def a few months ago so I'm thrilled. We had dinner with Mike Wednesday night. It was really good to see you, Mike. I've been so busy at work I was afraid I might not be able to find an evening when we could get together, but we worked it out. We went to P.F Changs which I have been craving for a few weeks and I had my absolute favorite Shrimp with Candied Walnuts--YUMMMMY! Mike was taking a health insurance certification class in Buckhead this week. I think he flew home yesterday afternoon. PJ's going camping this weekend so we are going see the Dark Knight (second time for me). Yeah it was good, but it was really long. I hate when you think a movie is over and then there ends up being another 30 minutes. Hope everyone has a good weekend! Donna B.

I'm in

Well, I have arrived at the Bertaut blog and I think it is a great idea. Thanks Donna for setting it up. Kathryn and I are moved in for the most part with everything unpacked and put away except for hanging our pictures. She's been traveling and it has all the makings of a fruitless excercise to hang them without her input so I am waiting on that one. Dallas has been great with a couple of exceptions...1) It is hot. I mean like wow, hot...sun hot, wishing for the days of Africa Hot to cool off hot. There should be a another word past hot that applies to weather but most of them only apply to cooking--boiling, broiling, searing. I think I will invent one--Let's go with "core of the earth hot". Ok, not great but it may catch on. Maybe as an acronym--COTEH. I'll work on it. 2) It seems like everyone I have been dealing with to set up my house, utilities, cable, furniture, etc is trying to screw me over or giving us bad service. Example: Call the cable company--Time Warner--Of course I expect to get screwed on cost but I am told that the first call will not allow me to choose my options of my cable it is just a set-up call...can you connect me to the "option specialist, miss time warner nightmare" no, you have to call this number. Strike one. Next they want to run my credit...why, I ask I have a time Warner account in CA for 5 years and I pay (on time I might add) $150+. Can't you look at my account? No, can't help you. Strike two. Finally get to the set up installation stage, "Oh, sorry sir the previous owners have not canceled their account so we can't set it up until they do". Strike Three. Hello Direct TV. This is one of several different stories regarding the issues I have had with service and cost issues from my bank, cleaning service, furniture delivery, appliance delivery and I am sure a couple more I am not thinking about right now. I'll post my cleaning service story next time...it is my favorite. I'll look through my pictures to see what I have but I am not making any promises...I only use people in my photos for scale. Ron

Stand By Hot-Lanta. I'm on the Way.

Just a little blurb to let you all know I'll be at the Westin Buckhead starting sometime Monday evening and leaving Thursday Afternoon. Snoozy (and I mean SNOOZY) certification classes are the order of the day, so much so that it was all Marla could do to talk me out of trusting my golf clubs to the TSA. Of course they'd immediately consider them some sort of weapon and arrest me (Crap! Did they hear that? It actually says on the TSA website that "We at the TSA do not appreciate loose talk and jokes about bombs, guns, weapons, or hijacking planes. Please be advised such talk could lead to your arrest." So be careful! Donna/Patrick I'll touch base once I'm settled. Have a nice evening! thanks...mrb

A Test

Are you a Democrat, a Republican, or a Redneck?

Here is a little test that will help you decide:

You're walking down a deserted street with your wife and two small children. Suddenly, an Islamic terrorist with a huge knife comes around the corner, locks eyes with you, screams obscenities, praises Allah, raises the knife, and charges at you.

You are carrying a Glock cal 40, and you are an expert shot. You have mere seconds before he reaches you and your family. What do you do?

Democrat's Answer

Well, that's not enough information to answer the question!

Does the man look poor! Or oppressed?

Have I ever done anything to him that would inspire him to attack?

Could we run away?

What does my wife think? What about the kids?

Could I possibly swing the gun like a club and knock the knife out of his hand?

What does the law say about this situation?

Does the Glock have appropriate safety built into it?

Why am I carrying a loaded gun anyway, and what kind of message does this send to society and to my children?

Is it possible he'd be happy with just killing me? Does he definitely want to kill me, or would he be content just to wound me?

If I were to grab his knees and hold on , could my family get away while he was stabbing me?

Should I call 9-1-1 ?

Why is this street so deserted?

We need to raise taxes, have a paint and weed day and make this a happier, healthier street that would discourage such behavior.

This is all so confusing! I need to discuss with some friends over a latte and try to come to a consensus.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Republican's Answer:

BANG!

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Redneck's Answer:

BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! Click.... (sounds of reloading)

BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! click

Daughter: 'Nice grouping, Daddy! Were those the Winchester Silver Tips or Hollow Points?'

Son: 'You got him, Pop! Can I shoot the next one?'

Wife: 'You are not taking what's left of that to the taxidermist!"

Welcome to the Schaubs!!

Here are a few pictures from our trip to Pine Mountain, Georgia over the July 4th Weekend:

Animals Attacking Poor, Helpless Car Emu Patrick and Zebra Thanks for posting a comment, Paul/Carol. If you click on the link at the bottom to "subscribe to: post comments (Atom)" you will get an e-mail everytime someone posts a comment. I'm still waiting to hear from Ron and Chris. I sent the invitation to join to Chris' old e-mail address so he said TWO DAYS AGO that he would check it and join. I left Ron a voice mail today because I think I may not have his current e-mail address either. Life's rough, ha.

If you want to sign Newt Gingrinch's petition to Congress "Drill Here, Drill Now, and Pay Less" just click on this link:

http://www.americansolutions.com/actioncenter/petitions/?Guid=54ec6e43-75a8-445b-aa7b-346a1e096659 --Donna B.

PJ Started French Horn Lessons Today

PJ starts middle school (6th grade) on August 11th and he was accepted into their band to play the French Horn. He had his first lesson today, and his teacher said that he did very well. He was so excited that he wanted us to video tape it to share with you guys. So here is a video of PJ playing the French horn for the first time.

Work in Progress with an incompetent worker

It must be the way I have it configured that does not allow comments to show up. I'll work on the layout and see if I can get it fixed (or I'll get Morgan to fix it--she has more time than me). I'd love to see your Disney pictures Mike and I'll definitely check out your website. Patrick has a page on Facebook. I've got nothing (ha).

Giving it another try...

I tried responding to your post, Donna, but it didn't show up. So I'll try again. I think this is a grand idea. Lord knows we are so split up and see each other so seldom this may be the best way to stay in touch as we go forward. I like it. Once I figure out how to do it, I've got zillions of pics from Disney I can share. My webpage is http://mbertaut.spaces.live.com/default.aspx?wa=wsignin1.0 if you REALLY get bored and want to read a lot of my musings and claptrap. Hopefully you're not that desperate, but you never know! I'll get the kids hooked up here soon, they are online all the time and have their own MySpace pages they can share. Take care....mrb

First Post

Here is my second attempt at a blog. My first is at http://www.positive-perspectives.blogspot.com/. I thought it would be kind of cool to have a family blog. If you have any pictures or anything you want to contribute, share, or save, please feel free. I don't have an e-mail address for Carol, Marla, Kathryn (did I spell that right? I'm really bad at remembering how to spell people's names), Melissa, Stephen, Josh, Abigail, or William, but if you guys could share that with me I would appreciate it so that I can invite them to join. Hope everyone is doing well. I spoke with Dad about his vacation this weekend and it sounded like they had a wonderful time. Maybe Chris could try to convince Dad to share some of his vacation stories in writing on here. I'll share tomorrow. It's late and I'm very green at this blogging thing (that's the only thing I'm green about, ha). Talk to you soon, Donna B.